Mike and I were watching TV when this commercial came on involving a hot air balloon. And I learned that I am, in fact, kind of an idiot.
Mike: “That would be my own special hell. Being in a hot air balloon.”
Me: “THAT would be your hell? You know, old people do that for recreation.”
Mike: “No steering? No control over where you’re going?”
Me: “What are you talking about?! You can steer a hot air balloon!”
Mike: “No, you can’t. You can just go higher or lower.”
Me: “But what about those sand bags?”
Mike: “??????”
Me: “Those sand bags that hang on the side of the balloon and you move them around to go in different directions!”
Mike: “Meredith, what the HELL are you talking about.”
Me: “………….Don’t they use those?”
Mike: “No.”
Me: “………..Am I thinking of a Mickey Mouse cartoon?………….I might be thinking of a Mickey Mouse cartoon.”
(silence)
Me: “So wait, how do they get around? They just float all willy-nilly?”
Mike: “That’s what I’m saying!!”
Me: “NAH….that can’t be right. People don’t just go into a basket tied to a balloon and hope for the best, do they? ‘Hey honey, going on a hot air balloon ride, might be home in an hour, might be home in three days.'”
Mike: “Pretty much.”
(I begin furiously googling)
Me: “AH! NOPE! WAIT — it says that pilots have a few tools at their disposal to direct the balloon. Like……..weather reports. And wind.”
Mike: “Dude, if you told me that counted as steering, and we were in a bar, and you were a guy, I would punch you in the face.”
Me: “Like you would be in a bar arguing about hot air balloons……….well, no actually I can totally see you doing that.”
Pile of Babies 
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